Meme created by Ollie Warren
Meme created by Ollie Warren



November 25, 2022

This is the moment I’ve been waiting for.  My je ne sais pas, my masterpiece, and the reason I get fired from the school newspaper. A look at the two movies filled to the brim with Harry Styles breathing loudly: Don’t Worry Darling and My Policeman.


First movie on the chopping block: Don’t Worry Darling. The plot of this movie is a hot mess and a half. It’s too fast and then too slow and then it’s over? Hello? It would’ve been wayyyy better as a show, and considering the Chucky T.V. series, you can get away with anything.


I did find it immensely creepy that Alice (Florence Pugh) has the same last name me, but it’s not like *l*v** W*ld* (Olivia Wilde) is stalking me, right?


However, there are some good things about this movie. The acting was great, the aesthetic was gorgeous, and the thrills were thrilling. It was a fun watch, and all the actors and actresses were just so pretty. You can’t do this to me! You can’t make all the people pretty! I actually like this movie. I just wish it could have been something more than a movie. A T.V. show would’ve been so much better, and there could have been more time to stretch out the  story and add more things that seem “off” in the world.


The plot, while in shambles, still has a story. Jack Chamber (Harry Styles), the greasiest man alive, traps his girlfriend Alice Warren (Miss Flo❤️, or Florence Pugh)  in a simulation where they play husband and wife until Alice realizes that things are off and attempts to escape. There is a lot of unnecessary scenes, such as a few horror sequences, but a few controversial scenes I think to keep in mind are the food scenes because I could smell the coffee and eggs and I liked it, and also the tap dance scene, as it reminds me a lot of the panic attacks that Florence Pugh is so good at portraying. Maybe take out the scene on the dining room table, thanks.


You should watch Don’t Worry Darling, just don’t spend your money on it. Considering you can go onto Amazon and watch it for free currently, I would take the opportunity.


My Policeman has invaded my brain. I can’t get rid of it. This movie is just so beautiful and I am so glad I saw it in theatre. I cried in that theatre, and I rarely cry about a movie! I haven’t felt this way about a movie or any piece of fictional media since I was 10-years-old. That’s a whole six years ago.


This movie made me enlist my friend into helping me draw the characters.


The story follows two timelines: ne in the 1950s and one in the 90s/00s.


The 1950s plot line follows as such: Marion (Emma Corrin) is a bookworm girl who falls in love with the policeman Tom (Harry Styles) and they get married. Patrick (David Dawson) is a museum director who becomes friends with the couple. Patrick and Tom become really good friends as the story progresses until Patrick gets thrown in jail due to some crime he committed. Marion and Tom continue their marriage.


The other plot line follows Marion (Gina McKee) as she cares for Patrick (Rupert Everett) after he has had a stroke. Tom (Linus Roache) is not too happy about having Patrick in his retirement home and refuses to acknowledge his existence. Marion goes through Patrick’s things and starts reading his personal journal from the 50s. She discovers how far Tom and Patrick’s friendship really went.


The story is excellently crafted with the character development going slow and realistic. It’s so real. The small, insignificant imperfections with each character is just so fitting for this story: Marion fidgeting with her hands, Patrick scolding Tom for moving while he’s drawing him, and Tom’s face picking. This isn’t a movie anymore; it felt like real life.


I adore My Policeman. I love it. It’s a 10/10 for me and it’s going on my list of favorite movies. The movie itself will be available for free on Amazon on Nov. 4. Also, I was going to complain about there being no LGBTQIA+ representation in this movie but there is, so congrats on doing more than the bare minimum.


Both of these movies were good watches, and I suggest you do watch both of them. But be warned! These are rated R for a reason, and for a really good reason at that. Have an adult with you or at least a 17 year old.

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About the Contributor
Ollie Warren is a senior writing and publishing major. They write the Flip Feature column, review Lincoln Park shows, and work as the managing editor of The SIREN. They love to watch movies, swim, and learn about history and science. After high school, they plan to go to college and get a degree in History Ed.

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